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The worst movie ever November 2, 2008

Posted by clintcarter in Movies.

Last Thursday night I went to Redbox to get a movie for Carey and I to watch.  The only thing I saw that looked halfway interesting was “Allan Quartermain and the Temple of Skulls”.  Here’s the Redbox description of the movie “Sean Cameron Michael stars as explorer Allan Quatermain in this adventure yarn, released just in time to whet the appetites of fans awaiting the fourth Indiana Jones film.”

I like Indiana Jones, so I thought, “why not”.  I approached it with very low expectations, but was open to being surprised.  I was definitely surprised.  There’s so much to tell you about it – I don’t even know where to begin.  The cover clearly shows airplanes, a lion, and Quartermain brandishing a whip -none of those elements were in the movie.  The movie title is “Temple of Skulls” I don’t recall that ever coming up during the course of the film.

I don’t know what I enjoyed more, the incredibly awkard dialogue, the plot and execution that didn’t even come close to working, the acting – there are no words.  If you gave me 2 weeks and $500 I could write, direct, and produce a movie much more watchable than this one.  My favorite moment (it’s hard to choose because there were so many) was the car chasing the train scene.  They are obviously going 5 mph but acting like it’s 60 mph.

I strongly recommend renting this movie from Redbox and watching it with friends.  The lack of everything needed to make a viewable movie is so appalling that it’s worth seeing.  My words to those involved in making this movie “Bravo for getting out there and giving it a shot.  Early returns say that you probably need to consider a different career path.”



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